Day 8 - Ladies of Calvary: 30 Marriage Challenge

30 Day Challenge: As Unto the Lord – Day 8

Reverence in Word, Part 1

Greetings to you all in the name of Jesus Christ!  I am excited that we have reached a new step in our bible study.  Today we will begin examining a new concept - “the honor which I owe to my husband is: All Due Reverence in Word.”

I will be referencing the Noah Webster 1828 American Dictionary of the English Language to define the new words and concepts for our study today.

We will start “Reverence in Word” by defining several words properly in order to understand what we are committing ourselves to begin.  Some of these words we defined earlier in our study, but I will review them for those who may have missed that portion of the study.


Due:  n. 1. That which is owed; that which one contracts to pay, do or perform to another; that which law of justice requires to be paid or done.
2. That which office, rank, station, social relations, or established rules of right or decorum, require to be given, paid or done.
3. That which law or custom requires; as toll, tribute, fees of office, or other legal prerequisites.

Reverence:  n. Fear mingled with respect and esteem; veneration.

Veneration:  n. The highest degree of respect and reverence; respect mingled with some degree of awe; a feeling or sentiment excited by the dignity and superiority of a person, or by the sacredness of his character, and with regard to place, by its consecration to sacred services.

Word: n. 1. An articulate or vocal sound, or a combination of articulate and vocal sounds, uttered by the human voice, and by custom expressing an idea or ideas; a single component part of human speech or language.
2.  Talk; discourse.
3.  Language; living speech; oral expression.
4.  Promise.
*The preceding quotes were taken directly from Noah Webster 1828 American Dictionary of the English Language.

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“Do the words I speak to my husband reflect a quiet trust in God as the sovereign controller of all that takes place in my life?”

Scripture references – Read Luke 6:45, 1 Peter 3:3-4

Focus today on 1 Peter 3:3-4

“Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; but let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.” 1 Peter 3:3-4 NKJV

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Let me just start by saying this particular concept of “Reverence in Word”, can be a difficult one for me personally.  I trip on this concept, in my own life, (NOT just my marriage) quite frequently.  First, those who know me personally know that I have A LOT to say (no comments Victoria).  That, of course, leads me to the “foot in my mouth” disease that seems to constantly plague me.  Secondly, well, let’s just say that a “meek and quiet spirit” is just not my cup of tea either!  This is one of those fleshly issues for me that must be crucified daily, and I do mean DAILY.  If it is in my own strength, shutting up is just not within my power, but with the Spirit at the helm, I can be steered into “meek and quiet” waters.

Having a conscious effort to tame the words coming from my mouth, was the first step toward healing in this area.  When I first repented over the words I spoke to my husband, I had to take small “baby steps” toward controlling my tongue.  When a situation arose with my husband where words were pivotal, I had to make a choice (I applied the rule each of us were taught early in life): “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything”.  I held back words that did not edify or encourage and if I could not find a positive word, I would stay silent or say, “Whatever you think honey.”  For this very reason, I am convinced that I have a permanent scar across my tongue from the constant biting back of my own negative words . . . no, really, I do!

Once the fruit of self-control became a more permanent fixture in my conversations with my husband, I was then able to move on to “bigger steps”.  The next step was not just controlling my tongue, but purposefully using words (and not using others). When speaking with my husband, I began to choose words that would communicate the respect for his authority and trust in God’s sovereign hand.  Now that these precepts are planted deep in my heart, the consistent practice of using edifying words, crucifying the flesh and allowing the Holy Spirit to steer me into “meek and quiet” waters have become like second nature a more frequent occurrence.

Let me give you a quick litmus test to use on yourself before you speak to your husband.  I still use this method quite frequently in my own mind before treading into “dangerous” verbal waters.  I simply ask myself, “Do you want to be right, or do you want to be married?”  There is no other choice, so please do not ask for one.  Hopefully the answer, in your mind, will be the latter; therefore, choosing edifying words in your marriage should begin to be a more frequent pattern.  I know it may sound extreme, but the fact is that God has a purpose for marriage and the wife being “right” constantly is NOT one of them.  There, I said it, label me as “extreme” if you like, but it really does not bother me to be called names – if one sister gains and inch toward having a more godly and fulfilling marriage, then it is worth the “sticks & stones” anyone might throw.

Memory Verse
Do not forget to commit your memory verse to your heart this week.  We will have a new verse next Sunday.

Ephesians 5:22
“Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God.  Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.”

In Christ’s service,

Mrs. Mac says, "Welcome!"

Sister Mac
(a.k.a. Joyful Socks Mom)

Tomorrow, we will continue with Reverence of Word.  We will examine the use of words that help communicate thanksgiving and discuss using a respectful tone of voice when speaking with our husbands.

*Please remember to make comments directly to this blog if possible.  Simply click on the title of this post above (in the email) and you will be redirected to the blog.  Once there, you can post a comment at the bottom of the lesson.*

Quotations used that are italicized are from the book As Unto the Lord by Pam Forester unless otherwise sited in this post.

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